The child I deserve

True confessions: As nice as I am today (hold your commentary please), I gave my mom and dad a run for their money all before the age of 3. I was a colicky baby. As a toddler, I threw such fits that I would vomit. And I learned quickly that while your mom might ignore a screaming kid, she won't ignore a vomiting one, so at 18 months old, I learned to vomit on cue. As a preschooler, I loved to change my clothes ALL THE TIME. So much that my mom created a rule: choose one outfit and wear it all day. Always looking for the loophole, I learned that if you pee on your clothes you can change them. So potty trained Amanda began to have "accidents" whenever I was ready to change my look mid-day. I ate the tops off markers and when my mom would ask me and my color covered mouth/face if I'd been eating markers again, I'd deny, deny, deny. I was precocious-- using words that I didn't quite know the meaning of (I think I might still do this) and taunting kids my age who hadn't learned to swim quite as early as I did-- "Come to the deep end, Allison!!" I BIT A HOLE in my sister's stomach when she didn't give me something that I wanted and then I cried when I thought I might get in trouble. I'm sure I had good moments, but when we decided to have children, I prepared myself mentally that I might get a kid just like me.

Now, Paxon is like me in many, many ways-- some good, some less favorable, but I'd say we made it from birth through three relatively unscathed. I am finding; however, that Asher in these early years may be the child that I deserve. He loves mischief. Asher, age one, makes sure I am looking, giggles, then b-lines to an electrical outlet-- shaking his head and saying "no no no" all the way. Lately, he's enjoying pretending to kiss me (open mouthed), then biting his teeth down not hard enough to hurt, but hard enough for him to raise an eyebrow and grin like he's gotten away with something. When he doesn't get his way, he lets me know. Loudly and with a body like a wet spaghetti noodle. Asher wants whatever toys Paxon has and seems quite willing to stand his ground to get what he wants. And, I caught him chewing on the lid of of Paxon's markers yesterday. My favorite Asher moment came recently when I was fixing lunch for the boys. Asher wandered into the open pantry. I knew he was in there, but thinking of the things on the floor decided he could play with a rolling cooler and an empty box for a few minutes. Then I heard rattling and crunching. This sequence of pictures tells the rest of the story:

You'd think these things would drive me crazy, and truly, some days they do, but I LOVE IT. I love seeing that mischievous sense of humor develop; it fills our home with laughter and we will have great practical jokes some day. I cherish his determination; it will help him overcome obstacles he'll face in his life's journey. And I hope he keeps his strong will; to know what you want and know how to go get it is a precious gift in life. Admittedly, I'm not sure quite what to make of the marker tops...